hope.
what are they?
are they reliable?
diasters? i guess so. conflicts are arising within the clarinet section coz of clarinets. it sounds weird to outsiders, but it is quite serious to "insiders". i went to do my CIP hours so i wasn't present to hear and see what has been happening during the sectionals today. i feel awkward now. i really don't know which side to side with. the problem is that i didn't even witness anything. this makes me NOT in the position to say anything unless i am some pro counselor which i am not. i wonder why they haven announce the posts... but nvm. time will come slowly. i must wait patiently.
anyways. back to the topic. jill and miaoting are still currently very disappointed, angry and sad about theodora deciding suddenly that she don't want to give them the leblanc clarinet. they didn't really want to tell me the reason why they badly want to change instrument so much. but of coz the 3 of us are all unhappy about the new arrangment of the band sit-in. i feel the worst. now i finally understand how the sec3 felt last year when they were sec2. the day when we entered the main band and combined practice with them. the feeling is 99% rotten. no wonder the sec4 now have least interest to come back and practice with us. i really can understand their feeling. nvm. what's done is done. it can't be undone. i have to confine myself and think about everything again. sigh.
last sunday, mothers' day, 14 may 06, MCB had got a performance @ sentosa. gaa. it actually sounded not so nice. solos aren't sounding as it shld be sounding. gaa. nvm. what's done is done.
today's event of the clarinets, i told Weijie. i feel better now. it feels like a load off. but of coz there are sacrifices. my phone was confiscated. coz i msg too much last mth. 1422 msg. actually is quite a big number. i have been like msging so many ppl. haha. but u know what? i don't mind a thing. at least by using so much msg, i can get a "load" off me. isn't it kind of worth it?
today we went to do our CIP. we went to AWWA and accompany the old folks for an outing. my folk was a male. he looks kind of energetic. we went to a "bao" factory then they buy some "bao" there. at first we thought that we are going to see them make the "bao" but it wasn't. we just went there to purchase "baos". gaa. we spent like only 1/2 hour there. then next we were supposed to go to the "chee cheong fan" shop. but then it closed down or sth like that. haha. it sound so funny la. after that we went to thomsom plaza to have ya kun kaya toast. it was quite a sad thing. i ordered milo. but the darn teacher keep saying that she don't want to order for me since i wanted milo which maybe don't have. i got quite pissed off. and she really didn't order for me. GAA. if she wasn't the form teacher of 4a, i would have told her off. i would have told her that i didn't get my drink. she is so the what la. unreasonable. crazy person. her buttons came off when we arrived back in school. haha. some only la. haha.
mdm koh said we going to sentosa this june. haiz. but luckily she said that she only picking a selected few. muhahaha. i want to go band la. today suppose to have sectionals la. gaa. then i would have known what exactly happened during sectionals. sigh. i wonder if i know the exact situation is better or i just hear is better. i suppose i better not side anybody. [sorry! -> to miaoting and jill] sometimes i just wonder if what that is happening, issit a must that these things happen? or they can be avoided? i don't know. perharps they can be. and perharps they can't. i supposed this is predestination.
whatever theodora's reason is for not giving them the leblanc, i think she knows it herself. she knows what she is doing. we all hope that it is not because she is being manipulated by anybody. we all had to trust her. i think it is because she is not totally in control of our section as a sectional leader yet, that's why she didn't give them the clarinets. maybe she just want them to wait till the day that she is officially given the post. or perhaprs Wai Kit is controlling the situation? who knows? in such case, we are the outsiders within the insiders. outsiders usually don't understand and can't really feel the way the insider(s) is/are feeling. but theodora is right. we all should be fighting for whatever we really want. i feel as if she is directing something to me too. i suppose for now, i must start training up myself to be able to take over her next year - just as what she told me she wanted me to.
i do hope i will disappoint neither Wai Kit, theodora nor mr tan. :) i promise myself that i will work hard.
remarkable results!