always look on the bright side of life
gaa. cant stand it anymore. i want myself to be happy! i keep contradicting myself. nvm. i know that i will have to get over with these happenings. studies and band still comes before all these happenings. i told myself that before i gave my answer and i will stand by what i said. i do as i promised. i dunno what to do. i supposed, i will carry on as if nth happened? but i know it is impossible. i dunno who to talk to regarding such stuffs. i felt like talking to ben suddenly. but i dont think i shld. nvm. jingting and weijie are online together now. are they chatting away happily? hmm. i feel that this font size is big. haha. nvm. so... i shall wake myself up now. i went around reading ppl's blog and i realized that ppl usually blog about happy stuffs. ehh. but certain blogs do blog about their feelings. i shall revive my blog once again from its sadness. (:
i realized that there are ppl whom i cant understand at all. but nvm. i shall try. juniors nowadays are so different from the juniors last time. they rebutt. they disagree. they disrespect. seniors nowadays are also different from the seniors last time. they heck. they slack. most importantly, they lose hope. i still dunno if sec2 are referred to as seniors or juniors. i admit that i belong more to the senior side's point of view. i heck, i slack and i lose hope. is like the band now is so terrible? the songs played now are simple music. the songs played last time were difficult music. pieces like apocalyps II, the merry widow, earth and many more. sigh. but we have to accept the fact that things have changed. the pieces played now may sound nice but it aint difficult throughout the song. pieces played now are like POTC, les miserables. mr tan said that he will be bringing phantom of the opera for us soon. i would love to play them all. other than these 3 pieces, i dont think other songs are really up to standard. but nvm. what's done can't be undone.
let's see. any latest happenings. hmm. ytd 2i were forced to go to the speakers' corner to listen to the topics said. ytd was pe lesson. ehh. after morning assembly, all vice-chairperson and treasurers had to go to see mrs sidhu(SEE WHO?geddit?) which i dunno why end up mr prem talked to us. is about teachers' day celebrations. treasurer collect $25 from the whole class and vice-chair to ask if who wants to perform. hmm. no replies of performers from 2i. haha. nvm. mr prem talked to us about relief lessons. those classes that takes more than 10mins to go down to the canteen for relief lessons will be reported to him or om han and the whole class will get detention. sigh. dunno why 2i teachers everyday also come to school. haha. healthy teachers that we have. anyways. i passed the msg about all these things to xinhui and asked her pass to wei jie. secretary important leh. haha. okiie la. all important except me. haha. since ppl can survive without me then how important can i be? ehh. then ytd also got national day rehearsal. everything was better than the other rehearsal. there was a cut-down of players for majulah singapura. 1st clarinet is left with only 1 player playing. theodora cant play too much for the time being due to her new braces. ehh. so angeline playing. haha. she say her high notes are like crap. haha. but she still played. hmm. then after the rehearsal mr tan said still got at least 1hour so we had an 1hour practice. we played POTC and les miserables. mr tan tried out majulah singapura with the 1st clarinet playing an octave lower. aiyo. then we play the 2nd clarinet score is the same mah. haha. bleahx. les miserables to nice! POTC also nice! (: after than nothing much happened. i went home, bathe, ate dinner, flare up, fell on my bed, and slept. ehh. i fell totally asleep at 2140. haha. actually 2100 already can sleep liao. but i started to msg someone. so it lasted only for 40mins before i really fall asleep. heehee. it wasnt a very nice talk but i want to learn to enjoy such moments. :P
and i promise my brother to dedicate a part of an entry to him. so here goes
He's really smart.smarter than i am. He is the best. He is the greatest. WOW
anyways. that was typed by my brother himself when i was on the phone talking to miaoting about tmr's concert performed by sajc, my dream school! ehh. is sajccb, not the school. haha. they rulex! (:
i don't like that color. i prefer this color. haha. i hate myself for who i am. anyways. i really want to know what happened to HIM. nobody knows. only he himself knows. his best friend cant understand it either. nvm. time is the only thing that i can give. and therefore i give him all the time that i have for him to reconsider. lalala. i want to change blogskin. this skin looks weird. haha. black black. now i like white. i want a simple and white blogskin. haha. huiwen's blogskin is so cute. haha. the one with the turtle. josiah used it as his blogskin. gaa. now i want to use. haha. i just realized huiwen likes...green? haha. her skins are like green or many colors. i dunno what type of blogskin i want exactly. i dunno how simple i want it to be. i dunno what color combinations i want to be. i dunno anything. i only know that i want to change blogskin. haha. i become lame out of a sudden. ytd i was msg HIM about lame stuffs. nvm. i irrtated him for dunno what reasons. i dowan to talk about it. there is a tkd tournament for black belts this mth end. i want to go see ben fight. and shaun. ehh. though i dunno him. but anyways, i want to go. but wei jie is going for sure, he said. i dunno if i shld go. it lasts for 2 days. and i badly want to go for the 1st day at least. everything was planned nicely last mth, just like everything was planned nicely for tmr. in the end? everything screwed up. tmr's plan screwed up. i dunno if that day's (tournament day) plan will be screwed up. i was told that i might not be given an answer next week. the answer that i badly want to know. but of coz i want to hear the positive answer, not the negative one. i really wonder why this happened. u said i am better than u in character. i told u not to lie, saying that u are better in appearance and attitute. but lately, ppl been telling me to forget about u and carry on with life. i heck them all. i told them i love u and wanted to be with u no matter what they would say. but i guess u think otherwise. sigh. nvm. tmr's plan is "renewed". i don't wish for such happenings to happen again but somethings are always beyond control. i have to let some ppl down to let some ppl be happy. i guess daffy is right by saying that she shld never be like me. i find myself a very undecisive person. i dunno what i want. when i get it, i dunno if i really want it. but there are things that i need, not want.
lynda and i chatted on msn today. we chatted on my tagboard too. sigh. she told me at my kind of age, i shld not expect love to last for eternity. she mentioned that i shld not be too serious but just playplay. sigh. but i cant help it. i really hope for relationships to be serious rather than playplay. although this isnt my first time getting hurt, i still want to try. but i guess i better stop trying. next 2 years, i dont think i want to get myself into such situations again where i dunno who i am and what i want. ren bu xiang ren, gui bu xiang gui. sigh. is either i keep to this love for the next 2 years (and now) or not i dowan to keep by anymore. heehee. i stay devoted to miaoting, my wife. haha. that is the easiest relationship to keep since there isnt any use being jealous. haha. but we not lesbians la. we just got "married" ytd during the rehearsal. haha. last time is she having "affairs", now is me. haha. but of coz we 2 won't mind such "affairs". is normal. haha. unless the "affairs" include another girl. gaa. haha. jkjk. i becoming so les now. bleahx. XP
i been keeping my eyes stuck to this com for like hours. since 10am? ehh. about 8 hours?! gaa. ltr i going for some prayers so i dont have time for homework! and tmr night got concert! oh no. i only left tmr morning and afternoon. heehee. tmr morning i want to watch gundam seed destiny. i keep missing the shows. but since tmr morning, nobody would call me, then most probably i wont forget to watch. haha. last week i missed it coz i received a call early in the morning at about 9am? i think earlier than that. haha. then we chat till quite a while. then i called back ltr coz i eat breakfast. i so guai. heehee. then after that he went for tuition. then i forgot about gundam! sigh. but i think is worth it. haha. forget gundam coz can talk to him. haha. that is so worth it. (: anyways. i gotta go for to pray to my ancestors. byebye.
i shall be happy. and i miss him so much. (:
remarkable results!