{bang}
am i dead? or still alive?
to help the needy students:
-butter cookies
-chocolate cookies
-marshmallow chocolates
-cards
-flowers (rose)
the 5 above mentioned items are for sale. XD
heex.
this is a way of publicating isnt it? -_-"
i wonder if it is efficient.
common tests are finally over! (:
but that means i gotta face the music.
my results. sigh.
i scared that i will fail more than half of the papers.
let me hope that my fear is for nothing.
who is ihateweijie?
why doesnt he/she leaves my tagboard?
or at least he/she shld leave a name.
fine.
he/she better not do that.
i will bash him/her up.
it will be my first fight.
i wont even bother if i will end up in the P's office or the VP's office
or even the police station or jail.
that person is like putting his/her hatred for wei jie on MY tagboard.
i didnt place a tagboard there for ppl to tag their hatred.
i don't understand.
i so vexed now. sigh. mood swing.
i still very unhappy about the water coolers.
i spent like more than half an hour in ntuc with kiesha just now.
we were considering what to buy for tmr's bus trip to hua yi.
heex.
alson is his name. (:
but josiah is right.
even if i know him, he also dunno me.
gaa. i feel inferior.
i feel as if i have changed since common test started.
(maybe during the weekends?)
everyday when i reach home, all i think of is sleep.
i slept at like 9pm?
usually in the past i sleep after 11.30pm
but now?
to me, and probably to many ppl,
sleeping is like being in ur own world.
no worries, no sadness, no hopes, no memories,
most importantly,
no love.
i think that is sufficient to keep me sleeping.
i felt like sleeping and nvr wake up
nvr come back to the reality.
i dowan to face reality.
must i?
you are dumb and timid.
face it.
since the fun that you loved is over,
get over it and find a new fun.
no point staying in the same old position.
your heart is already broken.
it cant be cured anyways.
stop holding high hopes.
you are already told that high hopes leads to a more disappointed you.
get over it.
get a life.
even if u know ur heart is at a risk of breaking once again.
HE probably wouldnt care even if u have no heart.
your heart is like a jig-saw puzzle now.
it just isnt possible to mend it back alone.
forget it.
you are hopeless.
class tee designs has brought us troubles.
so many ppl designing,
so little ppl choosing.
some are biased
so they choose their best friend's design.
this is unfair.
lets hope that hatred will be brought out once again.
ben's drawing is cool.
i referring to the one that he drew for dunno what reasons.
not the class tee.
i liked his design for the front of the shirt.
is so cool.
maybe others dont think so, but i do.
anyways.
he drew this guy pointing his finger at the reader of the paper
saying "you die"
heex.
actually is very nice when is not colored.
but then ben go color it!
it looks weird.
he drew it in less than 10mins.
maybe only 5mins or less.
the coloring really looks weird.
anybody wants to see can ask me. (X
i so wanna kill myself.
like lily (the child), i felt like a silly fat woman with a rope around my neck.
i drag it around everywhere i go.
everybody ignores me.
i felt like finding a big tree and tie the rope to the tree
then i send myself flying.
or
i walk across the road
when the "red man" appeared.
cars honk at me
ppl stared at me.
before i know anything, the ground rush up to meet me.
or
i rob a store.
i start running away frm the police who were chasing.
i pull the heater frm my back pocket.
i point it at the police.
the gun shot fell deep in the night alley.
i crumpled to the ground.
but ppl shall only the truth after i crumpled -
the heater has no bullets.
or
i murder someone. (hmm. i shld consider trying it on ihateweijie)
i ran away into the country.
i hid away in a church.
i smoked.
the church caught fire.
i tried saving myself out
but something hard fell on me.
i burnt.
my bones cracked.
my lower body is numbed.
i get worst as each day passes.
i said my last words.
and i let my head fall against the pillow.
hmm. familiar?
THE OUTSIDERS!!!
i miss the book so much so i read it.
but i really want to commit suicide.
i would choose to be a greaser than a soc.
greaser are those who keep close as friends, a gang.
it hurts to see ur own "brothers" die in front of u.
but to the dead, it is what they wanted.
dally wanted to die.
he died becoz johnny died.
sigh.
the storyline is touching and it carries a lot of meanings.
i was feeling so down last saturday that i would have cried reading this book.
i did even without touching the book. :'(
oh yeah.
tmr music lesson might be fun.
the japanese girls are joining our class.
hmm.
but we all will be so smelly.
after PE mah.
haha. i pity them.
let's hope the activity for tmr's PE wont be that sweaty.
is either i participate a lot
or
i dont participate.
i dunno. depends.
i no mood for doing such hyper stuffs.
that day's happening still ring greatly in my head.
it keeps my head spinning.
i would have fainted from it.
but i couldnt show that i am THAT weak.
i need to show a strong front now.
remarkable results!